At 23: The Adulthood Journey
Life, although not fully understood but by experience, can be funny. When you are young, you can’t wait to be old. Meanwhile, when growing up hits you hard, you can only wish and reminisce about being a child again.
This post has been long overdue. I have written the final draft only for it to be re-edited again since I did not post as at when due. Now I have to make this post up to date.
Having a systematic way of doing things can make one very lazy. Through the course of my life, I have been that privileged if you would put it that way. University was a private one and as such even up to the food and clothes you would wear, it was decided for you. The rules you must follow. By my profession as well, the vocational school had rules, hence no much choice. As insignificant or minute as that is, it was one of the indicating factors that I had been ushered into adult life. Making decisions by myself from feeding to dressing is one lifestyle I am yet to adapt to.
My boss at work thinks I do not like eating but the reality is I hate thinking of what to eat and making it myself. In the dressing part, after 7 years of black and white, I have to deal with colours, which isn’t much of an easy task.
Money matters and adulthood
The financial is always a thing to ponder when making a decision. Bills are already pilling up as a Corps member with limited funds. My parent removed me from their list of beneficiaries after my bar exams. Like you literally need money to breathe in Nigeria. How is that possible with no access to funds?
Just this year, I have made about three mistakes that were grossly and I am ashamed of and I thought my folks would be mad at me for. But instead for those different occasions, the only thing they say is welcome to adult life where mistakes are made and lessons are learnt. The times I spend crying they say dust it off and move on. “It is only the beginning” LOL Beginning of many mistakes and looking at myself as a failure? I am not ready.
Adulting is to owning your own actions. You make your decisions and must be ready for the consequences. No rules on how to play the game. You fail, you learn. No time for stopping, the show must continue.
Adulthood and Career decisions
A career decision is a big thing. Only if we had a horoscope to look far into the future so that it can determine what choice to make. Having waited 7 years to qualify for this degree, I decide I want to take another part. Does it make sense or not? I don’t know but let’s see how it goes.
Now whether or not I take that career path, it would mean that I have to submit myself to a long time of learning say for 2-3 years as the case may be before I find my footing in the chosen profession. It would mean absorbing like a sponge as much necessary information there is.
One might, of course, be difficult than the other- since it is relatively new. However, this does not change the underlying of continuous learning and looking for ways to improve oneself. It just makes you wonder what you spent the Q1 days of your life doing. You realize more than half of what you learnt in school is not relevant to your job description.
I am learning what responsibility is.
Before the Twitter ban, there was banter about what one has achieved at 23 years. I do not know the origin but I was saddened by the turnout. We compare ourselves with ourselves. What we hated our parents do to us when we were young. Like 23 is the benchmark for success. Nigeria is already as hard as it can be that 23 years old may still be trapped in the archaic school system.
Adulting in Nigeria is already hard enough that by your graduating year you don’t meet the qualifying age for certain opportunities. Let’s be guided and enjoy what life brings and don’t expect too much that you miss the reality.
Few questions I have for you. At what point did you realize you have entered this adulting life?
How do you deal with mistakes? How is adulting going for you?
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